Happy Birthday to me.. Happy Birthday to me! Is that self indulgent that I am singing to myself?? LOl I dont care if it is.. It was a Happy birthday but an introspective and reflective one as well. Birthdays started to get a little bla as I got older.. I was like WOW Birthdays are supposed to be fun and celebratory but they never were for me.. Then there was this year..which was very different than any other.
If I am being honest...I might not be here for this birthday if God had not healed me.
This birthday..all I wanted to do was be surrounded by some good friends and dance!
Yes you heard me Dance!!! The last time I did that was in Atlanta like a year ago?
That is wayyyyy too long ago!!!
37 years ago I was born... not knowing (or did I) that I would end up getting cancer one day.. Not knowing I would be blessed with a beautiful family.. an amazing husband and child. Not knowing I would be literally transformed and reborn on my 37th birthday.
Mom Grace and I went to Olive Garden for my birthday. We got a little and yummy cake with one candle. I posted a pic n fb of me blowing out the one candle... someone commented jokingly that I was missing a bunch of candles.. after I laughed I thought well not really.. I do feel like its almost my first birthday all over again.
I have been given a second chance to make this life the way God intended it for me.
To stop sleep walking through life.. to Follow my heart-
Its a beautiful sunny day- I am going to enjoy it!!
Love and light to everyone reading!!!!!
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Gotta have Faith
On this rainy spring day the word Faith is resonating in my heart and mind.
I am reflecting on how the definition of this overused and misunderstood word has changed for me in the last few years. When I was first diagnosed with cervical cancer in November of 09, I really was not aknowledging that God/my creator/Spirit (whatever name you give) was doing the healing..not me!!! I thought ..."hey these other people can heal themselves with alternative means..why not ME??:
All throughout treatments,surgery recovery etc.. I felt as if God was indeed holding me ..carrying me gently through the dark times. I have a flameless battery operated candle that my mother got me from the Christian store. It has on there a quote from the Footprints poem.
" When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you".
I had that candle "lit" the entire duration I was at the Clinic for surgery in Feb.
It was my visual reminder that God was with me (and my angels and guides).
Before all of these challenges, I had my doubts like most of you that something so invisible could feel so real and so amazing.
Here I sit May 14, 2011- stronger physically,stronger spiritually and mentally.
I take no day for granted.. knowing wow I overcame some pretty hard stuff. If God did not cradle me through it... It would have been so much harder. It makes me wonder how many patients going through cancer lean on this Faith.
So I started praying a lot after even.. and thanking God for my health and marriage as if it were already whole healthy and happy.
One day something changed in my house. I do not know specifically if it was ME just feeling better (so my energy started changing for the better-which affected my relationships) or was it God rewarding me for having Faith and just KNOWING miracles would await me.
Yesterday I had some program on a local tv station that was for young kids talking about bible stories. This one was about Abraham. God rewarded him so many great things once he truly believed in God (had Faith). This story resonated in my heart. It was my sign I think (those of you who really know me..know I am always looking for symbolism and synchronicities in events) that it is God.. :)
By the way..God for me is really in all things. I do not picture a big man on a chair up in Heaven..instead it is more energy based...seen in mother nature,the love in peoples hearts etc.. Its just more all encompassing for me.
It is such a great feeling finally to have a little more energy, be painfree and truly grateful in my heart.
I am feeilng pretty strongly it is my time to pay it forward in someway for all of the generosity that has come my way over the past few years.
I am so humbled by how beautifully supportive everyone has been.
Even those that have not really been close to me (maybe the whole cancer thing makes people uncomfortable and thats ok)- still have sent their love and I have felt it.
I am glad to be back in Cleveland and feeling good just in time for the great weather... Even the cleansing rain :)
I hope this blog stirs up your definition of Faith :)
Love and Light,
Andrea
I am reflecting on how the definition of this overused and misunderstood word has changed for me in the last few years. When I was first diagnosed with cervical cancer in November of 09, I really was not aknowledging that God/my creator/Spirit (whatever name you give) was doing the healing..not me!!! I thought ..."hey these other people can heal themselves with alternative means..why not ME??:
All throughout treatments,surgery recovery etc.. I felt as if God was indeed holding me ..carrying me gently through the dark times. I have a flameless battery operated candle that my mother got me from the Christian store. It has on there a quote from the Footprints poem.
" When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you".
I had that candle "lit" the entire duration I was at the Clinic for surgery in Feb.
It was my visual reminder that God was with me (and my angels and guides).
Before all of these challenges, I had my doubts like most of you that something so invisible could feel so real and so amazing.
Here I sit May 14, 2011- stronger physically,stronger spiritually and mentally.
I take no day for granted.. knowing wow I overcame some pretty hard stuff. If God did not cradle me through it... It would have been so much harder. It makes me wonder how many patients going through cancer lean on this Faith.
So I started praying a lot after even.. and thanking God for my health and marriage as if it were already whole healthy and happy.
One day something changed in my house. I do not know specifically if it was ME just feeling better (so my energy started changing for the better-which affected my relationships) or was it God rewarding me for having Faith and just KNOWING miracles would await me.
Yesterday I had some program on a local tv station that was for young kids talking about bible stories. This one was about Abraham. God rewarded him so many great things once he truly believed in God (had Faith). This story resonated in my heart. It was my sign I think (those of you who really know me..know I am always looking for symbolism and synchronicities in events) that it is God.. :)
By the way..God for me is really in all things. I do not picture a big man on a chair up in Heaven..instead it is more energy based...seen in mother nature,the love in peoples hearts etc.. Its just more all encompassing for me.
It is such a great feeling finally to have a little more energy, be painfree and truly grateful in my heart.
I am feeilng pretty strongly it is my time to pay it forward in someway for all of the generosity that has come my way over the past few years.
I am so humbled by how beautifully supportive everyone has been.
Even those that have not really been close to me (maybe the whole cancer thing makes people uncomfortable and thats ok)- still have sent their love and I have felt it.
I am glad to be back in Cleveland and feeling good just in time for the great weather... Even the cleansing rain :)
I hope this blog stirs up your definition of Faith :)
Love and Light,
Andrea
Friday, May 13, 2011
Where to begin....
Wow I havent posted since November???? Thats crazy!
I am finally moving forward I feel. I felt so stuck even when I was doing the holistic route.
For those of you who have not been in touch with me.. I also had a Modified Radical Hysterctomy Feb 8th... done by the ever amazing Dr Richard Drake. It was a rough recovery but I am doing great 2 months later.. Having patience with my body has been the hardest..I have been ready to move past all of this in every sense.. I will be getting a pet scan in May ..I was supposed to wait until June 30th but I just cant wait that long. I need something to be offical so I can really move on.
I have definately been in quite a depression...I am climbing out though and that is a great thing. I got a 10 dollar a month gym membership at Planet Fitness and I love it. I am going easy and taking baby steps. It has been a long time since working out. I am just doing the treadmill and some weights... I will get there :)
My birthday is coming up.... the 19th of May..Looking forward to celebrating with great friends. I sure have missed my peeps while I was in the South!
I am also starting to look for a job. Not sure what it will be but confident I will know it when I see it.
My hormones are leveling out due to taking some hormone replacement stuff..
I am finally smiling more, feeling so grateful for my life.
Its nice that the weather is great just in time for me to climb out of my cave!
This is going to be a great year .. I just know it!!!
I hope this finds everyone well!
Peace and Blessings!!!!!!
I am finally moving forward I feel. I felt so stuck even when I was doing the holistic route.
For those of you who have not been in touch with me.. I also had a Modified Radical Hysterctomy Feb 8th... done by the ever amazing Dr Richard Drake. It was a rough recovery but I am doing great 2 months later.. Having patience with my body has been the hardest..I have been ready to move past all of this in every sense.. I will be getting a pet scan in May ..I was supposed to wait until June 30th but I just cant wait that long. I need something to be offical so I can really move on.
I have definately been in quite a depression...I am climbing out though and that is a great thing. I got a 10 dollar a month gym membership at Planet Fitness and I love it. I am going easy and taking baby steps. It has been a long time since working out. I am just doing the treadmill and some weights... I will get there :)
My birthday is coming up.... the 19th of May..Looking forward to celebrating with great friends. I sure have missed my peeps while I was in the South!
I am also starting to look for a job. Not sure what it will be but confident I will know it when I see it.
My hormones are leveling out due to taking some hormone replacement stuff..
I am finally smiling more, feeling so grateful for my life.
Its nice that the weather is great just in time for me to climb out of my cave!
This is going to be a great year .. I just know it!!!
I hope this finds everyone well!
Peace and Blessings!!!!!!
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